I haven't been the happiest little puppy lately. I keep having these dreams. They are all different, but in each one there is always a strong, handsome man by my side. He is tall, and scruffy, and wears things like dark jeans, turtle necks, and leather jackets. He is always powerful, but always very sweet to me. Each time ofcourse the guys is different, and his presence is slightly different, but I also know that I need to find this man in real life. Don't get me wrong, Veronica is, well she is beautiful and she was unatainable. But I've always know that it wasn't going to be anything big. It's a fucking girl crush. Ofcourse I can not let her know that. But two leo's can't be together, it's a simple matter of fact. I'm passive in that I let her have what she wants and I don't ask for much of anything back. She gives me affection and we're ok, but I am not 100% happy. I want a real, strong man. So that he can hold onto me. Just that feeling of safety. I also can not wait until I turn 21 damn it. I can not wait till I can freaking leave Barbary Coast, I can not take it anymore.

On another note, I fucking love the Cranberries and I have no idea why it took me so damn long to get more of their music, especially considering that every song by them is absolutely amazing, and she has the best voice in the whole world.